I've Got A Feeling

I feel rumblings. Something's in the air! And it's not just all the smoke from the wildfires. It's immense, all-encompassing. Like a new beginning.

Okay, so, a lot's happened. I had a few scrapes with the fates that nearly skinned my sensibilities permanently. I dated a very handsome entrepreneur, who will remain nameless, and discovered I'm not cut out for high risks of any kind. I wish I was mindful of that fact as I agreed to marry an ex-boyfriend of mine from half my lifetime ago. Don't worry, reader. As many of you already know, that's ended also. What can I possibly say other than I think I have a problem. Call it drama. Call it romance. Call it a rock-hard commitment to suffering. I don't know. I just think it's time to give the proper organs their proper jobs.

I think we all know it's safe to say I've been doing this thing with a whole lot of heart, and very little head. This thing, this LIFE thing, it's been all about love, friendship, connection, enrichment, and celebration. That's why I chose teaching. I LOVE KIDS! I do. I love the way they look when they've discovered their potential. I love their optimism and wonder, their goodness, innocence, and spark. They know how to live! In the moment!

Heart. Sometimes I think it's all I got going. My brain likes to work but it's such a tool of my heart. It knows who's boss. She's always been the boss. So why is this bad? Okay. I'll tell you why. I'll tell you, but you already know. Hearts fall for stuff. The gooier, the better. Hearts tell you to do things when you don't have the time nor the resources. Hearts like to get you cuddled and kissed even when what you really need is sleep. The heart will keep you on the phone when you know darn well you need to spend some time organizing your schedule for the next day. Hearts get you reading and writing poetry instead of good, old fashioned self-help or business articles or comic books, even! Hearts will have you listening to another sad story, and actually trying to help, when you know your own story needs a lot of work, and yours wouldn't be found anywhere near the children's section.

I like my brain a lot. I've got to give her more to do. I want to promote her but she lacks experience with leadership. She's not even applying for the position at this point. Sharp kid. Underemployed. Overqualified? Let's not go that far.